What I've Just Watched: Part 2

On The Buses (1971), the big screen adaptation of the very popular sitcom broadcast by London Weekend Television since 1969, and produced for the big screen by Hammer, (yes, the horror studio). This was the first of 3 On The Buses films made during the 1970's, the first one is the best though. Set at the The Town & District Bus Company, it has bus driver Stan Butler (Reg Varney), stuggling to raise the money for his repayments on a new washing machine. Even though he's working extra hours, his overtime payments have been cut, because the bus company has decided to employ female bus drivers for the first time. However, this is likely to mean less overtime, and even less pay, so Reg and his work colleague and friend Jack (Bob Grant), come up with a plan to try and sabotage the new female employees whilst driving the buses, including diversion signs putting them on the motorway, lacing their tea with laxatives and putting spiders in the drivers cabin. But, they have to stay one step ahead of bus Inspector Blake (Stephen Lewis) who wants to sack the pair of them. 40 years on, it does come across as quite sexist, but this is what it was like back then. But, it adds a little more scope to the characters and the setting, this became the highest grossing film in the UK in 1971. Cinemagoers then couldn't be wrong!! :: 3/5



The Boys In Blue (1983), in the early 1980's, Cannon and Ball were very successful, with their own TV show. Then they were offered a film, directed by Val Guest (The Quatermass Xperiment (1955), Casino Royale (1967) and erm... Confessions of a Window Cleaner (1974)), based on the old Will Hay film, Ask a Policeman (1938), it seemed this would give Cannon and Ball an even bigger break. Well... erm... Set in the sleepy English village of Little Botham, (pronounced Bottom), this has two bumbling policemen, Sergeant Cannon (Tommy Cannon) and PC Ball (Bobby Ball), who never seem to get any big crimes, and only help with getting cows off the road, and sorting out the parking for local events. However, the district's Chief Constable (Eric Sykes) tells them the station will be shut. To try and keep it open, Cannon and Ball try to invent crimes but they accidentally stumble across a real crime involving millions of pounds worth of stolen paintings being smuggled out of the country, and there's a secret passage underneath the police station leading to a smuggler's cave. So, it's up to our two unlikely heroes to solve the case and bring justice. Sadly, this wasn't the Hot Fuzz of the 1980's, it's a 10th rate Police Academy. This just has Cannon and Ball doing their usual stuff, with very bad jokes and worse slapstick thrown in. Not even the appearances of Roy Kinnear, Jack Douglas and Jon Pertwee can save this film. It was bad then, and it's bad now. 1.5/5

The Beast Must Die (1974), from the underrated Amicus studios, (like Hammer, only just that little bit cheaper), comes one of their best horror films, except it's not really a horror, it's more of a mystery thriller with added blood. But it's a good film with a gimmick that William Castle would have been proud of. Set on a vast country estate somewhere in the English countryside, millionaire Tom Newcliffe (Calvin Lockhart) invites a group of people to his mansion for a few days, in the company and his wife Caroline (Marlene Clark). The guests include Prof. Lundgren (Peter Cushing, with a comedy South African accent), couple Jan and Davina Gilmore (Michael Gambon and Ciaran Madden), artist Paul Foote (Tom Chadbon) and diplomat Arthur Bennington (Charles Gray). The reason Newcliffe has invited them is that one of them is a werewolf, and for the few days they'll be staying at the mansion, there'll be 3 nights with a full moon. The grounds are rigged with cameras and microphones, all supervised by Newcliffe's security chief Pavel (Anton Diffring). Then, people start dying, but who could the werewolf be?? Plus, they all have something to hide. It's an enjoyable piece of nonsense, it has a good cast, but it has an absolutely brilliant score by Douglas Gamley, with Blaxploitation themes. The film's "Werewolf break" adds to the cheesiness, but it gives it a charm. 4/5



Fall of the House of Usher (1960), from the great Roger Corman, made for American International Pictures, and adapted from Edgar Allen Poe's 1839 story. This is a spooky horror, although slightly dated now, but Corman gets the best out of the film's star, doing his usual style of acting, which is always brilliant to watch. Sometime in the 19th Century it has young, rich socialite Philip Winthrop (Mark Damon), travelling to the House of Usher, located in a dark, desolate region of the New England countryside, to take his fiancée Madeline Usher (Myrna Fahey) to Boston to marry her. However, once Winthrop gets to the house, he is met with opposition by Madeline's corpse-like brother Roderick (Vincent Price), who tells Winthrop that the Usher family are plagued with a bloodline curse, that has affected the family for many generations. Plus, Roderick is determined to see to it that Winthrop doesn't leave with Madeline, which accumilates when Madeline passes away suddenly, and she's buried in the family tomb underneath the house. But, Winthrop learns from butler Bristol (Harry Ellerbe) that Madeline isn't really dead, but Madeline's body goes missing. It's a short but very effective horror film, with Corman using his box of tricks for some quite effective scares. Price is always brilliant at this sort of thing, hamming it up wonderfully, he was the best at that. But, there was more Poe adaptations to come from Corman. 4/5

1900 (1976), after the international success of Last Tango in Paris (1972), Italian director Bernardo Bertolucci decided to go one further, and created this epic which lasted 5 hours, and was at the time the most expensive European film, getting funding from Paramount, Fox and United Artists. It's an endurance test to watch, but it's satisfying to have done it, but by God, it's heavy going. It begins in Northern Italy in 1900, and lasts until April 1945 and follows the life and friendship of Alfredo Berlinghieri (Robert De Niro), whose grandfather (Burt Lancaster) is a wealthy landowner. Then there's the illegitimate peasant Olmo Dalcò (Gérard Depardieu), whose grandfather Leo (Sterling Hayden), is a socialist foreman, wanting the best for his workers. After World War 1, the new foreman is Attila Mellanchini (Donald Sutherland), a nasty, sadistic facist, who commits murder more than once. But, Alfredo, now the wealthy landowner doesn't do anything about it, leaving Olmo and the peasants to stand up against Attila, but Attila has a group of facists on his side, and there's another World War on the way. It's a hard watch, but well worth it. Bertolucci get's the best out of his cast, and Vittorio Storaro's cinematography is exquisite. But, for what is essentially an epic soap opera, did it really need to be 5 hours long?? You do get the nagging feeling that Bertolucci had something to prove. 4/5



Pee-wee's Big Adventure (1985), the feature debut of Tim Burton, who had come from Disney after a few shorts. It was his short Frankenweenie (1984) that promted Paul Reubens to employ Burton for the film version of his man-child creation Pee-wee Herman, who had a popular TV show in America. It's essentially a live-action cartoon, but you can see alot of the flashes of Burton's imagination that would come in his future films. It has Pee-wee Herman's (Reubens), treasured bike being stolen. He suspects that it was spoilt neighbour Francis Buxton (Mark Holton), who did it, although Francis denies it. Pee-wee visits a bogus psychic Madame Ruby (Erica Yohn), who tells Pee-wee it's in the basement of the Alamo in San Antonio, Texas. Pee-wee heads out there, only to find there's no basement, but along the way, he encounters truck driver Large Marge (Alice Nunn), he partakes in a rodeo, he manages to defuse a nasty situation at a biker bar, before being reunited with his bike on the Warner Bros. Studios backlot in Hollywood. But, even then, he has to use his wits and imagination to get his bike back. It's a very silly film, but it's very imaginative and is one for the family. It would be good to see Burton do something playful and entertaining like this, rather than going dark and gothic. But, it was only a hop, skip and a jump for Burton to Beetlejuice (1988) and then Batman (1989) 3.5/5

With Six You Get Eggroll (1968), and so it came to this, this fluffy yet dated romantic comedy would turn out to be Doris Day's final film, though no-one knew that at the time, but the death of the film's producer, Martin Melcher, who was also Day's husband contributed to that. So, despite it being funny, there is an added poignancy with this that it was Day's swansong. It has widowed mother Abby McClure (Day) struggling to juggle her 3 sons Flip (John Findlater), Jason (Richard S. Steele) and Mitch (Jimmy Bracken), and her late husbands timber business. Then she bumps into an old friend, widowed chemical engineer Jake Iverson (Brian Keith) who lives with his daughter Stacey (Barbara Hershey). Abby hasn't seen Jake for a while but something sparks between them, and they start dating quietly, then on a whim, they get married in Las Vegas. However, they never told their children, imagine the shock when the McClure boys find a man in Mommy's bed!! But, they all have to get used to living with one another, Stacey wants to be the woman of the house, but can't get used to that with Abby around, while Flip can't stand Jake. It's a product of it's time, rather like a smaller scale version of Yours, Mine & Ours (1968). As one film career ended with this film, another one began with this one, as comedian George Carlin made his debut in this. 3/5



Green Lantern (2011), based on DC Comics' superhero, created by Bill Finger and Martin Nodell in 1940, and brought to the screen by director Martin Campbell (GoldenEye (1995), The Mask of Zorro (1998) and Casino Royale (2006)). This is a good superhero film, which manages to be fun and exciting. It does feel a bit rushed in places, as if they tried to cram too much into nearly 2 hours. This has test pilot Hall Jordan (Ryan Reynolds) being beamed by a mysterious force to the site of a crashed spaceship, piloted by Abin Sur (Temuera Morrison). Abin Sur gives Hal a ring and a lantern, which beams him across space to the planet of Oa, home of the Green Lantern Corps. He is given a green suit, which is part of his flesh, and is initiated and trained by Tomar-Re (Geoffrey Rush) and Kilowog (Michael Clarke Duncan), although Corps leader Sinestro (Mark Strong), does not approve of a human becoming a Green Lantern. Meanwhile, scientist Hector Hammond (Peter Sarsgaard), performs an autopsy on Abin Sur's body and gets infected with a disease that gives him telepathy and telekinetic powers, which he uses against his senator father (Tim Robbins), and it's up to Hal to put a stop against Hector. It's a good origin story, but alot of it is all over the place. There's a nagging thought that there's a longer, better cut of the film out there. But, Reynolds has a likeable, cocky presence which is perfect for a superhero, but it leaves the door wide open for a sequel, but lets hope it's not as jam-packed as this. 3.5/5

Mega update, Don!

I know, I've had time to watch more films with Mum away. And there's more to come!!

One From The Heart (1982), after the nightmare of making Apocalypse Now (1979), Francis Ford Coppola wanted to make a small, personal film. He wanted to do a low-budget romance for $2 million in his new Zoetrope Studios in Hollywood. But, it soon became another nightmare, costing $25 million and bankrupting Coppola in the process. Shame really, as it's not as bad as what people at the time made out. Set in Las Vegas around the 4th of July, long-time couple Hank (Frederic Forrest) and Frannie (Teri Garr) are celebrating their 5 year anniversary together, but due to Hank being indifferent to Frannie wanting to go off on an adventure, they split up, and each spend a night with their ideal partners. Frannie goes off with a mysterious Latino musician called Ray (Raul Julia), while Hank goes off with beautiful circus girl Leila (Nastassja Kinski). However, Hank feels guilty about what he's doing and tries to win Frannie back, but she's absolutely in love with Ray, and they're planning to elope to Bora Bora together. But, can Hank stop Frannie from making a hasty decision so soon?? Much publicised, but it was strangled at birth due to bad word of mouth and Coppola spending too much money on his "Electric Cinema", which consisted of him directing much of the film from a silverfish trailer outside the soundstages. It looks beautiful, and it does have an old school theatrical feel to it, as well as the staging of an old Hollywood musical, with songs by Tom Waits, sung by him and Crystal Gayle. But, it lacks the one thing it's title suggests, heart, and the story is half-baked too. 3.5/5



Cars (2006), Pixar's 7th film for Disney, and probabily their biggest gamble as well. Coming straight off the huge success of The Incredibles (2004), it seemed like an odd direction to go in, to make a film set in a world entirely populated by cars. But, the gamble pays off, and it's one of their most colourful and detailed film to date. It begins at the final race of the Piston Cup championship, which ends in a three-way tie between retiring veteran Strip Weathers (Richard Petty), perennial runner-up Chick Hicks (Michael Keaton), and rookie Lightning McQueen (Owen Wilson). With a rematch due to take place a week later in California, Lightning is transported by truck Mack (John Ratzenberger), but after an accident with joy-riders, Lightning finds himself stranded in the middle of nowhere, well in the quaint, rundown town of Radiator Springs. After inadvertantly destroying the road in town, the town's judge Doc Hudson (Paul Newman) to repave the road. As he does this, he becomes friends with the other cars in the town, including Sally Carrera (Bonnie Hunt) and tow-truck Mater (Larry the Cable Guy). But, Lightning learns the truth about how Radiator Springs became so run down, and the truth about Doc Hudson. It's a good film, not as bad as I feared, and it's an engaging film. Only niggle is that it does go on for longer than it should do, and while it doesn't have the smooth, dynamic quality previous Pixar productions do, it's still an enjoyable film, with some great flourishes of imagination on display. Oh, and Jeremy Clarkson lends his voice to the proceedings. 4/5

The Pit and the Pendulum (1961), directed by Roger Corman, his second Edgar Allen Poe adaptation after The Fall of the House of Usher (1960), this is a dark, brooding affair, even if it was done on a small budget, but it has a great star doing what he does best, hamming it up big time, and that's what made him brilliant. 16th Century Spain, Francis Barnard (John Kerr) goes to the castle of his brother-in-law Nicholas Medina (Vincent Price), to investigate the death of his sister Elizabeth (Barbara Steele). Nicholas and his sister Catherine (Luana Anders) tell Francis that Elizabeth died of a blood disorder, but Francis isn't impressed with their explanation, and thinks they're hiding something. However, Dr. Leon (Antony Carbone) tells Francis that Elizabeth died of a massive heart failure. However, Francis learns of a darker side to Nicholas, and that Nicolas' father was a torturer during the Spanish Inquisition, and that his father's torture chamber is still in working order. However, Nicholas believes that the ghost of Elizabeth is haunting him after her death, although breaking into her crypt proves nothing, something is haunting all of them. It's quite an effective horror film, with some good scares, and a very suspenseful moments, especially a finale where it's title comes into play. Price is always great at this sort of stuff, and he was at his best, and there was more Poe to come from Corman. 3.5/5



The Masque of the Red Death (1964), for Roger Corman's 7th Edgar Allen Poe adaptation for American International Pictures, he went to England to make it, mainly to save money. It's the sort of thing Hammer would have made, but with Corman's hand, he gives it an eerie colourful look, and he gets the best out of his lead actor as well. Set in medieval Europe. the evil Prince Prospero (Vincent Price), who practises Satanism, invites the richest noblemen in the land for protection against the oncoming plague, the Red Death. Everyone else, mainly poor peasants are left for dead, and their villages are burnt to the ground. Although Prospero takes one peasant girl with him, Francesca (Jane Asher). Prospero arranges a masked ball at his palace, with the understanding that no-one wears red. However, Prospero discovers a strange figure in red at the ball whom Prospero believes to be Satan, but it isn't. Meanwhile, a dwarf jester called Hop Toad (Skip Martin), who takes revenge on his master Alfredo (Patrick Magee) for abusing his mistress Esmeralda (Verina Greenlaw), while Prospero's mistress Juliana (Hazel Court) tries to turn to Satanism, but that doesn't go well. It's a darker film than the previous Poe adaptations, but it does have good cinematography by Nicolas Roeg, but Price is always good as a baddie, almost channelling what he would later did in Witchfinder General (1968), but there would be one more Poe story to come from Corman.

Glastonbury (2006), directed by Julien Temple (The Great Rock 'n' Roll Swindle (1979), Absolute Beginners (1986) and Oil City Confidential (2009)), this was the third attempt at making a film around the annual Glastonbury festival, after Glastonbury Fayre (1972) and Glastonbury: The Movie (1996). Despite all good intentions, it actually highlights all that's wrong with the festival. The documentary focuses on how the Glastonbury festival came to be, inspired by the free festival movement in the early 1970s, like the Isle of Wight. It was started by dairy farmer Michael Eavis, who started it in 1970, and it was followed by another one. After a break of 8 years, it started up again in 1979, with Peter Gabriel and the Alex Harvey Band headlining, and it continued nearly every year ever since. It also focuses on the people who go to the festival, including New Age Hippies and old ones. The film was primarily made in 2002, when Eavis feared that because of licensing problems, it would be the last one ever, which much of the documentary was focused. However, it wasn't, and it's still going on to this day. Temple assembled the film from the festivals films between 2002 and 2005, as well as an archive of over 700 hours of footage. Instead of focusing on what the festival is really about, the music, it focuses on the idiots and troublemakers who seem to spoil it for everyone else. Watching this makes you not want to go to Glastonbury ever, they should have used all the best acts on there over the past 40 years, this reeks of self-indulgence. 2/5



Watchmen (2009), Alan Moore and Dave Gibbons' legendary comic book was brilliant on the page, and it seemed impossible to translate to the big screen. It's spent 2 decades in development hell, until Zack Snyder turned up after the success of 300, and has had a go. And he has succeeded with flying colours, it's very faithful but with the odd space for personal invention. Set in an alternate 1985 where America won the Vietnam War, Nixon is still in the White House and the Cold War has heated up dramatically, Edward Blake (Jeffrey Dean Morgan), who was a former costumed hero called The Comedian, is murdered in his apartment, masked vigilante Rorschach (Jackie Earle Haley) investigates, and the lives of other former costumed heros such as Nite Owl (Patrick Wilson), Silk Spectre (Malin Akerman) and Ozymandias (Matthew Goode) is put as risk, and superhuman Dr. Manhattan (Billy Crudup) has literally vanished from the face of the Earth. It could have been a disaster, but it isn't, Snyder's vision of the comic book is exquisite, it captures the spirit of the comic brilliantly, it's blessed with brilliant visuals and it has good performances to it's name. It's finally made it, and the result is one of the best comic book films of all time. And Alan Moore may just be proud of this film, but he won't admit it!! :: 5/5

Fanboys (1st view) - Decent enough. Some funny cameo appearances and enough decent Star Wars jokes to keep it entertaining - 3/5*




The Karate Kid (1st view) - Probably better than the original - 3/5*




The Last House On The Left (1st view) - Not nearly as disturbing as the original but still uncomfortable viewing at times. Very silly ending - 3/5*




London Boulevard (1st view) - One of the better UK crime films of recent years - 4/5*

A Town Called Panic (2009), a real oddity, based on a series of shorts as seen on Nickelodeon over here. A stop motion animated delight, made in Belgium, this has to be the most off-the-wall, bonkers animated film of them all, an absolute stream of conciousness from one thing to another, but it's absolutely hilarious and original all at the same time. Made entirely with little plastic toys and sets, it follows the misadventures of Cowboy, Indian and Horse, who live in a house on a hill with a farm next door. It's Horse's birthday, and Cowboy and Indian need to get him a present. They decide to build him a barbeque, so they order some bricks, they need 50, but they accidentally order 50 million bricks. Knowing they've screwed up, they hide the bricks on top of the house, which crushes their house. They try to build a new house from all the other bricks, but the walls keep on getting stolen by some strange creatures who seem to come out of the pond on the neighbouring farm. So, Cowboy, Indian and Horse go after them, taking them to the centre of the Earth, Antartica and to the bottom of the sea. It's absolutely mad, but you don't get stuff like this. But, we need more animated films like this, it's like something a child would come up with playing with their toys, and then decided to film it. If you haven't seen the shorts, do so now, as it'll be a taster of what to expect... 4.5/5



Spawn (1997), based on Todd McFarlane's 1992 comic book creation, this was meant to be a dark antidote to the campness of the Batman films of the time. Instead, it turned out worse than those, no thanks to an incomprehensable script and ABSOLUTELY APPALLING CGI, which ruins the whole experience. Is it any wonder stuff like this nearly killed off comic book films?? :-| It has mercenary Al Simmons (Michael Jai White), who does contract killings for an agency ran by Jason Wynn (Martin Sheen). However, Wynn betrays Simmons during a job in North Korea. Simmons goes to hell, but The Devil (Frank Welker) makes him a deal. If Simmons leads his army into armageddon, he will let Simmons see his fiancee Wanda Blake (Theresa Randle). By the time Simmons returns, it's 5 years later, and his fiancee has remarried. But, Simmons has a guide in the form of the clown like demon The Violator (John Leguizamo, looking like a cross between The Penguin and Krusty The Clown), but Simmons distrusts The Violator, and is seeking revenge on Wynn, but has help from Cogliostro (Nicol Williamson). It's essentially Highlander in hell, but it should have been better, but this was from a time when Hollywood constantly fucked up comic books. The CGI is so bad, that even Playstation games from back then would have rejected it. Leguizamo is simply annoying, and manages to ruin the proceedings. Is it any wonder it's being rebooted?? 1/5

Revenge (1990), directed by Tony Scott, fresh off the success off Top Gun (1986) took on this action thriller based upon a novella by Jim Harrison. It's a straight forward film, but it has a good cast, with a lead who was at the top of his game 21 years ago, and it's plot is good for a well worn revenge cliche. It has retired fighter pilot Michael J. "Jay" Cochran (Kevin Costner) who goes to Mexico for a holiday, accepting an invitation to spend time with his friend Tiburon "Tibby" Mendez (Anthony Quinn) at his mansion. They spend most of the time playing tennis and shooting, however it turns out Tibby is really a powerful crime lord, and his much younger wife Miryea (Madeleine Stowe) is unhappy in her marriage, primarily because Tibby doesn't want children and that would spoil Miryea's looks. So, Miryea begins a secret affair with Jay, even though Jay is very cautious of the situation. They make a rendezvous in a cabin miles away belonging to Jay. But, Tibby follows them there, sending Miryea to a whorehouse, and leaving Jay for dead. But, he isn't dead, and he wants to get even with Tibby and find Miryea. It's a quite moving film for a revenge thriller, but it has Scott's usual glossy, sun-soaked visuals throughout. Costner's great, (always an underrated actor, unfairly criticised), but the great Quinn is a standout, switching from kindly old man to psychopath in a split second. 4/5



Assassins (1995), written by the Wachowski Brothers and Brian Helgeland, and directed by Richard Donner. This is a good action thriller with some good action sequences, even if alot of it is a by numbers film, but it has a good pairing, and some good moments of suspense. Donner is always a reliable director, especially with action. This has professional assassin Robert Rath (Sylvester Stallone) who does paid hits for an unknown boss, but Rath is wanting to get out doing hit jobs and retire. However, he's out ready to do one hit, and he's beaten into doing it by Miguel Bain (Antonio Banderas), who turns out to be more of a psychopath. However, Rath sends Bain packing, and goes on to his next hit. Involving knocking off 4 Dutch businessmen and computer hacker Electra (Julianne Moore). However, Bain appears again, but Rath seeks to protect Electra, thinking he could use her as bait to get Bain. This takes them from Seattle to Mexico, where Rath's money is being held, but they see a vantage point where Bain could get Rath killed, so they use it to their advantage. It's a good film, not as bad as what critics made out at the time, this helped get Banderas his foot on the ladder in Hollywood, whereas Sly is his usual self. If only the Wachowski's could do more scripts like this... 3/5

Spawn is a diabolical movie! Truly awful!

Glad you liked A Town Called Panic though. Brilliant film and very, very funny.

The Girl Who Leapt Through Time (1st view) - Japanese animated sci-fi romance. Much better than the bulk of Ghibli films - 4/5*





The Illusionist (1st view) - From the director of Belleville Rendevous, this follows an elderly magician in Edinburgh who befriends a young woman who believes he can do real magic. Unlike Belleville, this isn;t a masterpiece but it's still very, very good. Incredibly sad and beautifully animated - 4/5*





Despicable Me (1st view) - Good fun. I loved the little yellow creatures - 4/5*

Gimli The Pirate wrote:

Spawn is a diabolical movie! Truly awful!

Glad you liked A Town Called Panic though. Brilliant film and very, very funny.

I'll have to post some of the original A Town Called Panic shorts on here.

American Splendor (2003), based on the life and comic books of Harvey Pekar, this is an unconventional biopic that combines the conventional dramatised biopic with filmed interviews that you would normally see in a documentary. Yet, it makes a winning combination, giving the film a unique character. Harvey Pekar (Paul Giamatti) was a lowly file clerk at a local hospital in Cleveland, Ohio. He gets through life talking to his co-workers about life, music and everything else, while at home, he has a massive collection of old books and LP's. One of his friends is one Robert Crumb (James Urbaniak), who finds success with his underground comic books. This gives Pekar an idea, and decides to write his own comic book series, American Splendor, first published in 1976. The success of the comic book series leads to Pekar marrying Joyce Barber (Hope Davis), who co-owns a small Delaware comic book store. The success of American Splendor leads to Pekar making regular appearances on David Letterman, and it makes him something of a celebrity, an embittered reluctant celebrity. Giamatti always makes films worth watching, and he captures Pekar's mannerisms and angst perfectly, written and directed by documentarians Shari Springer Berman and Robert Pulcini, this is a good biopic/documentary of a complex man and his struggle with fame and the rest of the world. 3.5/5



Senna (2011), a moving documentary about an unbelieveably talented driver. This documentary by Asif Kapadia focuses on the short life of Ayrton Senna, the Brazilian Formula 1 champion whose unorthodox talents made him something of a maverick on the race track, but his patriotic duty to Brazil made him a national hero. It's such a colourful life of a great man. It starts in 1984 when he joined Formula 1, and in one of his early races at the Monaco Grand Prix, how despite heavy rain delaying the race, Senna made his best result of the season. He started to make a bigger impression the following year, when he joined Lotus. He would win the 1985 Portuguese Grand Prix. He joined Alain Prost at McLaren-Honda in 1988, but this led to a bitter rivalry, as Senna always tried to better Prost, this came to a head at the 1989 Japanese Grand Prix when they collided, and Senna kept going, missing a chicane. This led to a 6 month suspension from Formula 1. This would lead to many clashes with FIA President Jean-Marie Balestre. But, Senna would keep winning, but his career was cut short in it's prime at the 1994 San Marino Grand Prix. It's a brilliant document of an amazing man, who loved motor racing but also loved Brazil, then a poor, crime-ridden country. But, Senna gave the country a sense of hope. But, archived from thousands of hours of races, interviews and home videos, this is a great documentary of a much missed talent. Formula 1 hasn't been the same since. 4.5/5

Even Cowgirls Get The Blues (1994), after Gus Van Sant found success with My Own Private Idaho (1991), New Line Cinema gave him freedom to do whatever he wanted for a follow-up. However, he went for a 1976 novel by Tom Robbins that had been branded as unfilmable. However, Van Sant wanted to prove everyone wrong. He had something to prove alright, but the film is a confusing, dull mess. Set in the 1970's, it has model Sissy Hankshaw (Uma Thurman), with a mutation that has given her gigantic thumbs. She uses the thumbs to hitch-hike across America. However, she gets a job through her friend friend The Countess (John Hurt, like Quentin Crisp crossed with Julian Clary), which takes her to a ranch out in California to film a commercial amid a load of mating whooping cranes. However, at the ranch, Sissy befriends Bonanza Jellybean (Rain Phoenix), who leads a rebellion against the the management, and take over the ranch, that's when the police come in, and Sissy has second thoughts about her giant thumbs. Alot of the film doesn't make sense, and it seems Van Sant bit off more than he could chew with this one, (it was delayed for a year after abysmal advance screenings, so it was re-edited to heck). Despite having a brilliant score by k.d. lang, the film is colourful but cold, and even it's cast including Pat Morita, Keanu Reeves, Grace Zabriskie, Roseanne Arnold, Heather Graham, Udo Kier, Ed Begley, Jr., Sean Young, Buck Henry, Carol Kane and Crispin Glover can't save it. Van Sant was cautious after this. 2/5



Private Benjamin (1980), written and produced by Nancy Meyers and Charles Shyer (Baby Boom (1987), Father of the Bride (1991)) and directed by Howard Zieff (Unfaithfully Yours (1984) and My Girl (1981)), this is an amusing little comedy with a good lead performance, and some good comedy set pieces. Not surprising as it became one of the biggest comedies of 1980. It has Judy Benjamin (Goldie Hawn) getting married to Yale Goodman (Albert Brooks), who just happens to drop dead on their wedding night. Confused and unsure of what to do, Judy receives duff advice from army recruiting sergeant Jim Ballard (Harry Dean Stanton) who makes the army sound more glamourous than it is. She joins, and gets the shock of her life when she see's how hard it really is. But, she manages to perservere and eventually gets promoted, much to the annoyance of Captain Doreen Lewis (Eileen Brennan), who wanted to see Judy fail. Then, Judy finds herself falling for French doctor Henri Tremont (Armand Assante), and a relationship blossoms when she's posted over to France, but is she ready for another long-term relationship. It's a good comedy, with some funny set pieces and with Hawn giving a good fish-out-of-water performance, but kudos to Brennan as the long suffering captain who has to put up with Judy Benjamin. 3.5/5

Transformers: Dark Of The Moon (1st view) - I love Michael Bay films. The Rock is one of the finest action films ever made, and I’ll happily sit down to watch Pearl Harbor and then a Bad Boys double bill any day of the week, and then round the evening out with a smattering of Armageddon. But the first Transformers film was a bit of a damp squib. Despite having no love at all for the Transformers of yesteryear, the idea of robots beating each other up appeals to me, and while I never expected the film to be great in terms of quality, it should at least have been great in terms or fun, and in this it was only partially successful. The sequel was in many ways, worse. It just gets tiresome after a while, repetitive action and lame comedy. And no–one will ever convince me that the transforming effects in the first two are good, they certainly aren’t helped by the fact you çan never actually tell what’s meant to be happening. It didn't help that, to me, they all looked the bloody same.

For the third film, the comedy is reduced and the stakes are much higher. It's the At Worlds End of Transformers. And for some reason I really quite liked it. A lot. More than the first two combined. It's still silly, badly written, overlong, and has some atrocious acting. Much of it makes little sense. I still don't know who half the robots are, the voices of all but three make it impossible to hear what's being said and the final battle is so choppy, it's easy to forget that there are actually two opposing side. And there really is only so much you can take of robots beating the stuffing out of other robots before you want it to stop. But I did like it. The effects are much smoother and the 3d (I had no choice) was superb, by far the best I've seen. Though I still couldn't help but laugh when everyone cried over the death of a robot I couldnt remember the name of.

Enter The Dragon (1973), HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII-YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! This is the film that the late Bruce Lee is most remembered for, the one that made him a superstar. Pity he didn't live to see what a global success it became, however time has not been all that kind to this film, and it takes it's sweet time getting going. In Hong Kong, Shaolin martial artist Lee (Bruce Lee) is approached by British agent named Braithwaite (Geoffrey Weeks) to infiltrate an island where a martial arts competition is taking place, organised by Han (Shih Kien). It turns out Han is wanted for drug trafficking and prostitution, however, the island is only partially in their jurisdiction, so they can't investigate thoroughly. Lee agrees to take part, and finds himself competing with American playboy Roper (John Saxon) and African-American activist Williams (Jim Kelly). Lee learns that Han's bodyguard O'Hara (Robert Wall) had been involved in the death of his sister Su Lin (Angela Mao). So, as well as doing the mission for Braithwaite, it also becomes something of a personal vendetta for Lee. It does have some good moments of action, but it's not the best kung-fu film to have come from the era, and it's marred by bad acting and some bad dubbing. Lee does handle the action scenes well, but apart from that, he doesn't have much to do. A film which promises alot, but doesn't deliver it all. 2.5/5



Dark City (1998), directed by Alex Proyas, (The Crow (1994), I, Robot (2004)), this is a dark, complex thriller with references to Kafka. Masterminded by Proyas and co-writers Lem Dobbs (The Limey) and David S. Goyer (Blade, Batman Begins). It's a film with good ideas, but it's too complex and clever for it's own good. Set in the titular Dark City, this begins with John Murdoch (Rufus Sewell) awaking in a hotel room with no memory of how he got there or who he really is. But, he gets a phone call from Dr. Daniel Schreber (Keifer Sutherland), who warns him to get away from the hotel as a group of men known as 'The Strangers' want him, led by Mr. Book (Ian Richardson) and Mr. Hand (Richard O'Brien). Murdoch gets away in time, learns his real name and learns he has a wife called Emma (Jennifer Connelly), and that Inspector Frank Bumstead (William Hurt) wants to talk to Murdoch in connection with a series of murders. Murdoch discovers he has psychokinetic powers like The Strangers, and he uses them to get away from them. But, what are these powers for?? Dr. Schreber has the answers, but the biggest question of them all is the mystery of Dark City and what lies beyond it's walls. It's very confusing, despite a good cast and complex plot. It's good to see a think-piece like this, but it would help if it made sense. However, it wasn't all bad, the sets built at Fox Studios Australia were reused the following year for a little sci-fi film called The Matrix (1999). Every cloud has a silver lining and all. :: 3/5

Gallipoli (1981), produced by Robert Stigwood and Rupert Murdoch, and directed by Peter Weir. This is a film that shows a different view of World War 1, as well as showing what Western Australia was like in the 1910's. This helped put Weir on the map, as well as it's young star who showed great potential all those years ago. It begins in Western Australia in May 1915. and farmhand and sprinter Archy Hamilton (Mark Lee) wants to join Australian Imperial Force, however his Uncle Jack (Bill Kerr) who trains him, is scornful of this. However, Archy heads off to Perth to enlist after a race at an athletics carnival, he meets fellow runner Frank Dunne (Mel Gibson), who works on the railways. They travel by train and over land to Perth and enlist. They get to Perth, enlist and head off to Cairo, Egypt, training by the Pyramids and they're under the leadership of Major Barton (Bill Hunter). Their mission is to head to the Gallipoli peninsula in Turkey, and take on a German stronghold there. However, they're based on the beach in front of a cliff, and unable to advance any further although Archy and Frank take part in helping the British land nearby. It's a good war film, using musical cues from Jean Michel Jarre's Oxygène. But it does explore two unforgiving wildernesses, that of the Australian outback, and the horrors of war in Turkey and Egypt. Weir has always been good with tales of survival and loyalty, and this helped get him in Hollywood, as it did with Gibson. 4/5



Shorts (2009), after Grindhouse flopped, multi-tasking director Robert Rodriguez found himself retreating to making a kiddies film again, but it's a good change back after his last couple of adult themed films, and even if his last couple of kiddies films weren't all that good, (Spy Kids 3-D and The Adventures of Sharkboy and Lavagirl in 3-D), he learns from his mistakes, and makes a quite old school family adventure which is entertaining and silly too. Set in the community of Black Falls, where all the houses are the same, and everyone works for Black Box Unlimited Worldwide Industries Incorporated, ran by Carbon Black (James Spader), it has a group of kids, including Toby 'Toe' Thompson (Jimmy Bennett), Loogie Short (Trevor Gagnon), Helvetica Black (Jolie Vanier) and Nose Noseworthy (Jake Short) as they come into contact with a rainbow coloured rock which can grant any of their wishes. But, nothing goes to plan, especially when the grown-ups try to get a hold of the rock. It's a silly bit of fluff, but it's better than what you might think, as it's an old fashioned morality tale at heart with a universal message, be careful what you wish for. Rodriguez has a good imagination when it comes to stuff like this, and the juxtaposed storytelling is a good idea, (lifted from his 'brother', a certain QT. ) Rodriguez is a brilliant director of children, and it has a game grown-up supporting cast including Jon Cryer, Leslie Mann, Kat Dennings and William H. Macy. 3/5

Shadows and Fog (1991), Woody Allen wanted to do something different after Alice (1990), and he made this tribute to the German expressionist cinema movement of the 1920's and 1930's by Fritz Lang, G.W. Pabst and F.W. Murnau. Despite it's bleak look and European feel, the result a good Woody film, with an excellent cast and mixing humour and suspense. It has lowly clerk Max Kleinman (Woody) being awoken from a deep sleep by a mob of vigilantes who are looking for a killer known as The Stranger. However, no-one tells Kleinman what is going on, or what part he's playing in their plan, leaving him to go through the night clueless, looking for someone who knows what's going on. Meanwhile, circus performer Irmy (Mia Farrow) and her clown boyfriend Paul (John Malkovich) have a row when Irmy discovers Paul is having an affair with tightrope walker Marie (Madonna). Irmy runs away, and finds herself with a group of prostitutes (Lily Tomlin, Kathy Bates and Jodie Foster), and Irmy has a fling with rich student Jack (John Cusack). However, she ends up with Kleinman, and he ends up being suspected as being the Stranger, and they go on the run. It's a well made film shot in a stark, sharp black and white, with some good humour and design on display. It's one of Woody's better films of the 1990's, coming after a few duds in the 1980's. This has a good supporting cast including Kenneth Mars, Donald Pleasence, William H. Macy and John C. Reilly. 4/5



The Great McGonagall (1974), directed by Joseph McGrath (Casino Royale (1967) and The Magic Christian (1969)), and co-written with the great Spike Milligan. This is a Goonish comedy, all filmed at Wilton's Music Hall in Whitechapel, London, and it's a comedic look at the life of one of Spike's heroes. He may not have been a great poet, but he had the ambition and could fool you into thinking he was a genius. Set in the 1800's, this is about William Topaz McGonagall Esq. (Spike), who gives up his job as a full time unemployed Scottish weaver to devote his life to poetry. He does acting work on the stage, where he uses the opportunity to recite some of his poetry. However, people hate it, and he uses the fruit and veg they fling at him as food for his family. But, McGonagall perserveres, and falls in love with Queen Victoria (Peter Sellers), who is very big in England. McGonagall devotes most of his poetry to her majesty, and although she rejects his advances and kindness, he still has dreams of becoming Poet Laureate. But, most of the highlights is all in his head. This is very silly, with some very funny moments and gags, (Prince Albert looks like Hitler, and the cast breaking for lunch, and government health warnings on coffins.) But, Spike has a likeable presence as McGonagall, eccentric and hilarious, with Sellers adding lunacy to the part as Queen Victoria, as well as Spike's regulars like John Bluthal, Victor Spinetti and Charlie Atom. 3/5

Unstoppable (1st view) - As far as runawya train films go, you could do a lot worse than this - 4/5*




Transporter 2 (1st view) - Very silly, very enjoyable- 4/5*




The Dilemma (1st view) - 4/5*




True Grit (2nd view) - Even better than at the cinema and with subtitles, I now know what Bridges is saying - 5/5

Shrek Forever After (1sxt view) - A massive improvement on the third film, but thr first is still the best - 3/5*

Transformers: Dark of the Moon (2011), after the WGA and SAG strikes hurt the quality of Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen (2009), there was hope that the third film in the franchise would get things back to normal. But, it ends up being even more confused and all-over-the-place than what the second film was. It does have good moments of action, but that's it. The film centres around a U.S. Government cover-up regarding a spaceship from Cybertron landing on the moon in 1961, which is what the whole space race was done around. 50 years later, and a fuel cell from the spaceship is discovered in Chernobyl, and Optimus Prime (Peter Cullen) goes up and finds former Autobot leader Sentinel Prime (Leonard Nimoy). Meanwhile, Sam Witwicky (Shia LaBeouf) is having trouble getting a job, while his new girlfriend Carly Spencer (Rosie Huntington-Whiteley) has a close relationship with her boss Dylan Gould (Patrick Dempsey). But, after getting a job, Sam comes under attack from the Autobots, and is reunited with the Transformers, who come under attack when they discover Sentinel Prime made a clandestine deal with Megatron (Hugo Weaving) and the Decepticons to bring Cybertron back, but it means the end of Earth. Despite Michael Bay doing what he does best, it isn't enough. There's too much going on, alot of it doesn't make any sense, and even the humans can't save the film, it might have well been a cartoon. Not even cameos from John Turturro, John Malkovich and Frances McDormand can save the film. 2.5/5



L.A. Confidential (1997), based upon James Ellroy's 1990 noir-thriller, and brought to the screen by Curtis Hanson. This is a complex, exciting police thriller about corruption and extortion within the Los Angeles Police and the criminal underworld. It's a powerful thriller, with a brilliant cast, capturing the era down the ground and really bringing film-noir to a new audience with a violent streak and a modern attitude. Set in the early 1950's, this focues on 3 LAPD officers caught in a web of sex, murder and corruption, which is centred around a massacre at a downtown coffee shop. There's Detective Sergeant Jack Vincennes (Kevin Spacey), who consults on a cop show, who gives police info to tabloid magazine writer Sid Hudgens (Danny DeVito). Sergeant Edmund Exley (Guy Pearce), is on the rise in the department, even if he testified in a police brutality, and Officer Bud White (Russell Crowe) has a "violence first, questions later" approach to police work, which gets him into trouble. The only lead is call girl Lynn Bracken (Kim Basinger) who knows alot more than she's letting on. It's very well made, and it shows the dark side to the Los Angeles people would think off, it has a great script by Hanson and Brian Helgeland, a smooth score by Jerry Goldsmith and helped put Crowe and Pearce on the map in Hollywood. Maybe, in hindsight, this was the film that deserved to win at the 80th Academy Awards. 4.5/5

The Way Back (1st view) - Peter Weir's first film since Master and Commander can't match the greatness of that sea-faring epic, but it's still a remarkable, accomplished and inspirational film. Almost a shame that it probably isn't true.




The Resident (1st view) - Decent enough, but I'd love for Hammer to make a film in the style of their films from the 60s.

High Plains Drifter (1973), Clint Eastwood's second film as a director, and he made this western from a screenplay by Ernest Tidyman (Shaft, The French Connection), which owes alot to the Man With No Name films that Clint did with Sergio Leone. It's alot more moody and graphic than what Leone did, but he would have been pround with what Clint did here. In the town of Lago, a nameless drifter (Clint) rides into town. He comes into the saloon and has a drink, but there's 3 hoodlums there. So, he heads across the street for a shave and a hot bath at the Barber's shop. The hoods follow him there, and Clint shoots them dead. This makes him something of a hero in the town of Lago, which is a mining town who pay protection money to 3 outlaws Stacey Bridges (Geoffrey Lewis), Dan Carlin (Dan Vadis) and Cole Carlin (Anthony James), who had killed Lago's previous Marshal Jim Duncan (Buddy Van Horn). So, the town ask the stranger to protect them from the outlaws coming back. The stranger is given anything he wants. He makes dwarf Mordecai (Billy Curtis) both sheriff and mayor, and paints the town red, literally. It's a very unconventional western, a revisionist western, like the sort Sam Peckinpah was making at this time. But, Eastwood was starting to hit his stride as a director, and he had learnt alot from Leone and Don Siegal. It certainly wouldn't be his last western. 4/5



The Outlaw Josey Wales (1976), Clint Eastwood optioned a book by Forrest Carter for his 5th film as director. He had finished at Universal, and signed up a big deal at Warner Bros. where he would stay for nearly all his career. This one was a dark, violent western which was gave Clint one of his best performances, with a colourful cast and a good, gripping story. It has Missouri farmer Josey Wales (Clint) seeking revenge after his wife and son are murdered by a group of Union Warriors. He is taken in by Confederate guerrillas, led by Captain Fletcher (John Vernon), but refuses to surrender and guns down a band of Redlegs with a Gatling gun. Wales goes on the run, with a $5,000 bounty on his head. Wales is a man who would rather travel alone, but on his travels heading for freedom in Mexico, he ends up with wise old Cherokee Lone Watie (Chief Dan George, who nearly steals the film), Navajo woman Little Moonlight (Geraldine Keams), an old woman from Kansas called Grandma Sarah (Paula Trueman), and her granddaughter Laura Lee (Sondra Locke), and they encounter Comancheros too. It's another revisionist western, but Clint was in his element with this, Josey Wales is a prime example of an anti-hero, a sad casualty of the American Civil War, but this proved to be a successful western in a time when westerns were dying out. 4/5