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 Corrupted Wishes

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Jinks
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PostSubject: Re: Corrupted Wishes   Sat Aug 10, 2013 2:45 pm

Granted they move out to a sex commune, however an even noisier group of howler monkeys move in instead.


i wish i won the lotto

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PostSubject: Re: Corrupted Wishes   Sun Aug 11, 2013 3:07 am

Granted, but the taxman claims it all.

I wish I didn't have to get drunk to sleep well.
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PostSubject: Re: Corrupted Wishes   Sun Aug 11, 2013 2:35 pm

Granted, you dont sleep at all!


I wish Hayfever was curable

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PostSubject: Re: Corrupted Wishes   Mon Aug 12, 2013 12:17 pm

Granted, but yours is uncurable, everyone else doesn't get it.

I wish I could get rid of this underarm infection.
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PostSubject: Re: Corrupted Wishes   Sun Sep 22, 2013 7:28 pm

Granted but your nut sack rots off instead.

I wish i had an M&S Prawn Mayo sandwich

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PostSubject: Re: Corrupted Wishes   Wed Sep 25, 2013 1:42 am

Granted, it's off though.

I wish I didn't have to do this works course.
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PostSubject: Re: Corrupted Wishes   Sun Sep 29, 2013 7:35 pm

Granted, you have to be in work instead, on your own. And its busy.

I wish i could find a way to get to England for Xmas

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PostSubject: Re: Corrupted Wishes   Wed Oct 02, 2013 10:01 pm

Granted, but you can never go back to Ireland.

I wish my family wasn't so dysfunctional
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PostSubject: Re: Corrupted Wishes   Sun Nov 03, 2013 3:46 pm

Granted, theyre WAY too efficient meaning you are never allowed to do anything out of the ordinary again - every day becomes a chore of pre determined outcomes.

I wish i could smoke at my desk

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PostSubject: Re: Corrupted Wishes   Tue Nov 05, 2013 12:07 am

Granted, but you have to do it everyday from 9-5 for the rest of your life.

I wish people weren't so nasty about certain films.
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PostSubject: Re: Corrupted Wishes   Sat Nov 16, 2013 2:50 pm

GRanted, but their indifference drives you to murder them instead.

i wish i had superpowers.

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PostSubject: Re: Corrupted Wishes   Sun Nov 17, 2013 2:29 pm

Granted, you can only turn into inanimate objects like lampposts or tables

I wish this pain in my throat would go away.
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PostSubject: Re: Corrupted Wishes   Mon Nov 18, 2013 4:43 am

Granted, you get a headache instead


I wish American websites had cheaper Postage options for the UK


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Frakkin toasters!

So, what, the murder weapon was a top sirloin?

He's a klutz, Mrs. Landingham. Your president's a geek!
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PostSubject: Re: Corrupted Wishes   Tue Nov 19, 2013 2:45 am

Granted, but they can never sell what you want.

I wish my voice would come back.
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PostSubject: Re: Corrupted Wishes   Sun Nov 24, 2013 2:50 pm

Granted, but it's Joe Pasquale's voice.

I wish i had another job

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PostSubject: Re: Corrupted Wishes   Tue Nov 26, 2013 5:09 pm

Granted, it's cleaning toilets with your tongue.

I wish I had better working hours.
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PostSubject: Re: Corrupted Wishes   Sun Dec 22, 2013 4:53 pm

Granted, but all thegood stuff happens at night instead.

I wish the loos were so bloody far away in the building!

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PostSubject: Re: Corrupted Wishes   Tue Dec 24, 2013 2:31 am

Granted, they're in your bedroom, all clogged up too!!

I wish Christmas would hurry up and get here!!
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PostSubject: Re: Corrupted Wishes   Tue Dec 31, 2013 7:14 pm

Granted, but your family changes religion and dont celebrate it.

i wish people would stop calling

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PostSubject: Re: Corrupted Wishes   Fri Jan 03, 2014 2:12 am

Granted, you become deaf

I wish the same thing as the user above.
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PostSubject: Re: Corrupted Wishes   Wed Jan 22, 2014 8:00 pm

Granted, its because your head has fallen off.

I wish there was something to do.

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PostSubject: Re: Corrupted Wishes   Sun Jan 26, 2014 3:14 pm

Granted, you can do boring accountancy for the rest of your life.

I wish it would stop raining.
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PostSubject: Re: Corrupted Wishes   Sun Jan 26, 2014 3:37 pm

Granted, its hail stones the size of guinea pigs!

I wish i could work out how to do the next chapter of story we're writing at work

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PostSubject: Re: Corrupted Wishes   Tue Jan 28, 2014 4:03 am

Granted, but just as you do figure it out you lose your memory and give up writing.


I wish my nose wasn't so cold!

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We take unto ourselves the power and glory.
Behold! We are the Nine,
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Frakkin toasters!

So, what, the murder weapon was a top sirloin?

He's a klutz, Mrs. Landingham. Your president's a geek!
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PostSubject: Re: Corrupted Wishes   Tue Jan 28, 2014 12:06 pm

Granted, your head is on fire.

I wish these reports would report themselves.

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